meanderings

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I am wild, wise, and wonderful.

“Peace of mind is not a rare and exotic flower that only blooms on deserted islands or on top of mountains. You don’t have to travel far and wide to find it. Relaxation is actually a native plant that grows in your own backyard–a hardy one at that. It never entirely gives up, although we repeatedly try to uproot it.” 

–Veronique Vienne (The Art of Doing Nothing)

Recently, I was asked where my heart is meandering and how I might delegate certain tasks in order to follow those winding paths through the forest of my mind. It has not been easy to delegate – the other adult in the house currently came home from a second hip surgery, and helping her is a major task that cannot be delegated but takes up much of my day. I may get frustrated or irritable here and there, but this is a fulfilling task that brings me a sense of joy.

The smaller tasks, like dishes and laundry and certain meals, I have been able to delegate to my Sun. Most days, he is more than eager to jump up and help because he earns extra time on his Minecraft style games. Other times, he is grumpy about the prospect of cleaning and doing chores – which is completely acceptable, everyone is allowed to have a bad day or a bad couple of days, and he does end up helping with a bit of coaxing.

My left wrist and hand have been acting up on me – we are sure it is just a carpal tunnel flare up, which may not sound serious to some, but those who deal with it know that it can be very serious. It is uncomfortable to type and pick things up with my left hand, but the real pain comes when I twist my wrist a certain way or attempt to grip something too strongly.

I haven’t spoken much about my recent steps toward better mental health, mostly because I am unsure as to how to word it, but what I have been doing has been such a major force in my life these last few weeks. My medications have changed and I have a bit of time to myself in therapy twice a week. Between these two things, I have been able to settle my spirit a bit in order to truly sense the Great Spirit around me. Yoga has become a near-daily routine for me, and I catch myself regularly connecting with Spirit in ways I had never done before.

Where is my heart meandering? It is leading me down the path of discovery, and I am rather content with my progress thusfar.

☽ ✰ ☾
victoria

 

 

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